Wimmins Vs Mens

Y’all, I need help understanding wimmins. You see, after 29 years of marriage, I’m still confused and searching for enlightenment about women in general and marriage specifically. Try as I might, I can not figure-out the logic that females use?

I can deal with the “I’m having a bad hair day” or “shut-up and listen” or “leave me alone because there are issues to resolve” or “are you still here? Go away”. I get one or more of these ‘tudes everyday. I guess it could be worse so call me lucky Joe.

But when it gets really bad such as: piercing laser eyes along with: “Joe, you have crossed the line” or “buster, you are one word away from divorce city” or “I’ll carve-up your ass into tiny pieces”. I start looking for an escape route. To be fair, W is not like that all the time -- I’d say she’s only that way about 99.99% of the time.

Yeah -- Yeah -- I understand that I’m not always prince charming, so the SD has points. However, please do not tell the damn She Devil I said that because the very last thing I need is hearing DW say - “see, Joe, you admit to your short comings!”

This touchy feely thing that wimmins express is difficult to deal with. Why can’t women be more understanding of men and our side of things? After all, we are kind-of, or almost like, or similar to humans.

And men are easy to understand. We, shower once or twice a week, drink-down a 12-pack of beer daily while watching sports or trash TV. We fart several times in a row. We hang-out with the family dog and sleep in the same bed with him. We wake up refreshed the next AM and do that routine all over. Life is good. What’s wrong?

Wimmins, Geez.